I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
he puts the penis in happiness.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
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