I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
We need a shit load of segways right now
Randomize
