but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
