god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize