I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
he fucked my hip out of place.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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