you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
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You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
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my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
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