So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
