Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
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