wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
