VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Can Purell be used as lube?
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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