Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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