I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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