Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
