You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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