this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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