I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
i think we sleep fucked last night...
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
