I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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