Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize