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• (917): View more from New York City

  omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.

  (310): View more from California

  wait, who's paul?

  (917): View more from New York City

  exactly.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  wait... oh

  Fav 9 3717 1200

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever

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• (954): View more from Florida

  Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.

  Fav 9 3690 1273

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm a corrupt cop.

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• (716): View more from New York

  I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out

  Fav 0 598 457

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• (561): View more from Florida

  I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates

  Fav 4 718 526

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated

  Fav 0 575 403

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again

  Fav 2 746 410

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine

  Fav 0 530 377

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.

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