It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize