well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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