I can text with my tongue
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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