so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
