I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves