ADVERTISEMENT

• (503): View more from Oregon

  She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.

  Fav 2 902 1909

  share tweet
  

• (402): View more from Nebraska

  I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors

  Fav 8 5275 829

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (937): View more from Ohio

  just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window

  Fav 8 3474 885

  share tweet
  

• (716): View more from New York

  dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex

  Fav 21 5846 929

  share tweet
  
• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (773): View more from Illinois

  It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.

  Fav 16 5452 1036

  share tweet
  

• (501): View more from Arkansas

  I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.

  Fav 19 4732 2215

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (614): View more from Ohio

  lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.

  Fav 6 2523 1007

  share tweet
  

• (270): View more from Kentucky

  I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.

  Fav 9 1970 861

  share tweet
  

• (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore

  Fav 2 871 1385

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (612): View more from Minnesota

  You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.

  Fav 4 1115 520

  share tweet
  

• (518): View more from New York

  I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual

  Fav 1 702 496

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (607): View more from New York

  I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.

  Fav 0 504 599

  share tweet
  

• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?

  Fav 2 550 328

  share tweet
  

• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night

  Fav 0 46 5

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.

  Fav 2 84 12

  share tweet
  

Randomize