I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
