Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
