At least make sure they are 18
Why
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize