"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize