i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize