Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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