I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Who died my cat blue again?
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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