We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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