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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
