I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
