well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
