Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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