Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
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He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
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I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
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