Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Randomize
