he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
