WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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