Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Randomize
