now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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