Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
