I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Randomize
