My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
