You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
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So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
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Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk