Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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