people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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