you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize