I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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